This is my story-what do you think?

Well-I havent over checked it since I've written it, but I hope you enjoy it!! And I havent finished it.

Prologue

It was year 3567, when 鈥渞eal鈥?high-tech was born.

During that day, a scientist began to invent a game. It would take place in the sky-where hundreds of kids would go, and have to survive the dangers of the wild. It included Naruto-Runescape-and much more. But the scientist made a mistake-he made it so powerful, not even himself could stop it. But he was a genius, he created a sign, it would go on a shoulder of one player. And this player would be in danger, he/she had the chance to destroy the game, but that meant they would be destroyed with it. IT would be a bulls-eye, a circle with a dot in the middle, located on the shoulder. The game would begin when the kid would enter the room-they could design their own outfit. They got to choose-camera-video camera-food-water-backpack-bedding. but only two! The teens would have to group up with others to stay alive.

HENRY GOES-

Jess poured her orange juice, she smiled at her 13-year-old younger brother. She was fifteen, and cared much for her brother. "Since mom and dad is gone for a week, we should clean the house," Jess told her brother Henry.

"Sure, that'd be great," he replied. "Want some orange juice," Jess asked. "Yes please, but add a little bit of water," Henry requested. Suddenly, Henry felt weird. "Henry! Oh my gosh, Henry!" Jess screamed. Henry was turning into small puzzle pieces. He felt dizzy, then he knocked out.